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MEN-WOMEN RELATIONSHIPS – Arranged Marriages

There is a very little know secret about the history of arranged marriages in the United States of America.  Many of these practices were carried about to insure that daughters and/or women were married into families that were financially secure.  Here is an excerpt from my book, “Checkered Fences”, about my mother’s and myself personal experiences with the topic.  I was born in the year 1955.

“There in the living room sat three young men.  I stood in the living room with my hair parted down the middle in two pigtails.  Since we lived in the desert, I had dust on me from head to toe from playing basketball in the dirt.  I stood waiting for my father to finish his conversation.

I heard Daddy say to the young men, “Yes, she’s a good cook and house cleaner.  She also knows how to sew.  Diane, these are some of the guys I work with.  I need for you to bring us something to drink.” He said.

I looked at my father and asked, “What do you want me to make? Coffee, tea, or Kool-Aid?”

My Daddy looked at the three men and asked each of them what it was they wanted to drink.

“Coffee,” said one.  ‘Tea,” said another and “Kool-Aid,” said the third.

“I’ll have some coffee,” my father replied.

“Okay.” I said as I went into the kitchen to prepare the drinks.  I then asked Daddy, “Where’s Moms?”

“She’s working late,” my Daddy replied.

Later, I came out with the drinks and laid them on the coffee table.  “Is there anything else you need?”  I asked of my father, waiting to leave.

“Wait.” My daddy ordered.  “I want you to tell them how good you’re doing in school.  You know my daughter is an honor roll student,” he said to the young men.

I stood, not saying a word, looking at the floor.  One of the young men looked at me strangely and asked, “How old are you?”

“Sixteen.” I replied.

“Have you ever dated?” Asked another young man.

“No.” I replied.  Looking at my father, I asked, “Can I go now?”

“Okay,” he replied.

I happily and swiftly left the room, hoping that my brother was still waiting, I ran to the backyard.

“What took you so long?” My brother asked.

“Our Daddy,” I replied.  “He’s trying to marry me off again.”

“He just won’t give up, will he?” My brother replied.

“You know that’s how he met our mother,” I said to my brother.

“Really?” My brother replied.

“Yes, Daddy is a War World II Veteran.  That’s how he was able to get our house.  Daddy took a month’s vacation and went to his hometown in Ringgold, Louisiana, looking for a wife.  He asked around town for a wife and told everyone he was looking for a virgin.  He was shown several young girls. When he saw our mother picking cotton in the fields, he said now that’s the one.

They met on a Monday.  My father took her to church a couple of times.  Since she was thirteen years old, he asked our grandmother, Madea, if he could marry our mother.  Madea said she would consent only if our mother agreed to marry Daddy.  Moms said yes and she married our Daddy that Saturday of the same week.  Our mother was thirteen years old and our father was thirty years old.  Daddy then brought her to California.

Alma Hudson, Author

Book:  Checkered Fences

Email Address:  Quench1@msn.com

Website URL:  http://www.eloquentbooks.com/CheckeredFences.html

Tagline:  Men-Women Relationships/Arranged Marriages

Short bio:  Alma Hudson works in legal management and is actively involved in community and environmental issues.  Ms. Hudson has an Associate’s and Bachelor of Arts Degree and lives with her two children and husband.